I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Randomize
