idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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