you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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