this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
