a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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