girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
