so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
