We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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