p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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