Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
