Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
