her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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