you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize
