Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
