I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
