I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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