He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
