Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You are the jesus of drinking
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
