i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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