I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
