his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
