whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
