but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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