I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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