I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
