You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
