Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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