okay pat passed out under dana's car
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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