My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
