one might say we're banned from that church
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
