So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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