Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
