Fine. I'll sleep in my office
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Randomize
