we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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