sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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