Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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