That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
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