Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize