A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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