i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
