shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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