Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
