For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
