Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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