we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
