I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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