Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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