i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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