Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
