Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
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